can we get nightvision for the apartment?
the day after is always just damage control
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Can you bring me the toilet please
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize