i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
i need some magic done to my vagina
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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