WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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