he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
