you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
