i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
