Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
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I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
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why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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