Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
