But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
