Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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