So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Dicks are not precious.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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