Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
