Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
