i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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