I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I have poison ivy on my dick
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.