Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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