He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
