Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
my poor anus
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
