really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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