just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she was so not down for the gang bang
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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