I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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