Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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