Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
