Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
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