how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
