She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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