Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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