If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
