I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
