we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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