I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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