if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
