you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just high enough for therapy.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
