We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I love having hate sex.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
