We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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