Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize