I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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