Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
