What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
