I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
