what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
