They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
