my soul wont recognize me after tonight
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
