Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
