what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
