they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
