His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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