love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
