Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
