Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
