I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
We are all done wearing pants today
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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